On Friday night at the SCG, Tania and Jamie Serong and their family will gather in the Fremantle rooms for a presentation in recognition of their son Calebโs 150th game for the Dockers.
Theyโll then head in separate directions.
While Tania takes her seat in the stands among the Fremantle friends and familiesโ section, her husband will make his way onto the hallowed turf of the SCG to be part of a guard of honour for Sydneyโs players as they run onto the field.
If you think Matthew Pavlich, the Fremantle great turned Sydney chief executive, was conflicted, spare a thought for the Serongs, whose sons Caleb and Jai go head-to-head for a grand final berth.
Unlike just about everyone else in the sold-out crowd on Friday night, the Serongs canโt lose, no matter what the result is. But they canโt win either.
โIโm really torn,โ Jamie told this masthead this week. โNo matter how you look at it, youโll have one extremely happy young boy, and one devastated young boy. Itโs going to be a challenge on that front.โ
Sibling rivalry in September is not uncommon in the AFL. The Hill brothers, Brad and Stephen for Hawthorn and Fremantle respectively โ squared off in the 2013 grand final. Brothers Reid (Sam and Ben) and Shaw (Rhyce and Shaw) met in the preliminary final the year earlier, as did the Selwoods (Joel for Geelong, and Scott and the late Adam for West Coast) in 2011.
This will be the third time Caleb and Jai will play against each other at AFL level, but never have the stakes been so high.
The match will be a family reunion of sorts. Almost 20 of them will be there, including the boysโ grandfather and aunt from Mumโs side, Calebโs wife Chloe and her parents, and Jaiโs girlfriend and her sister.
The brothers have dismissed the occasion as just another game, and theyโll treat each other as just another opponent, but itโs not as straightforward for their parents.
This has not been an easy week for them. For Tania, there has been an underlying nervousness since it became apparent a fortnight ago the two clubs could meet in a preliminary final.
โItโs a wonderful problem to have, but itโs still intense,โ Tania said.
When their boys play, the Serongs have a foot in each camp. Mum will sit with one club, Dad the other.
When Fremantle hosted Sydney in July, Jamie watched the game with the Dockers families as he had not seen them for a while, and Tania was with the Swans. They decided then they would swap for the next match-up.
While most mothers sit on the fence, Taniaโs allegiances are firmly with the Dockers. No, she does not have a favourite son, but as neutrality is difficult for her, she has decided she would be all-in behind the team she is sitting with.
The next day, sheโll swap colours and watch the replay from the point of view of the other team, to appreciate the other perspective.
โIโve tried to watch games as a neutral โ you donโt watch anything, youโre off in fairy land, [and] you canโt ground into the game,โ Tania said. โItโs really important to watch the game on one side or the other.
โYou canโt actually barrack for two teams at once. This week, Iโm purple.โ
The exception will be if Jai is lining up for the winning goal after the siren.
โI would be with the one kicking โ thatโs a special moment,โ Tania said. โIf you have the opportunity, take it.โ
Tania, though, wonโt be wearing the Fremantle colours, nor will the couple be putting on split scarves. That drew too many weird looks, she said. Instead, she will wear a badge for both sons, one on each side, as her show of support.
Usually, when only one son is playing, Tania takes her eye off the ball to keep watch on him. When the two clubs last met โ and she was sitting with the Swans โ she did not know where Caleb was until he had the ball.
โA couple of times I checked what his stats were like to keep an eye on how he was going,โ Tania said.
โYou canโt actually barrack for two teams at once. This week, Iโm purple.โ
Caleb and Jai Serongโs mum, Tania
Jamie has a different approach. Earlier this year, he found himself applauding Fremantle more, only because they scored more in a come-from-behind victory.
โI do have a real weird feeling, itโs not how much I support but how much I donโt get angry,โ Jamie said.
โI can get frustrated if the oppositionโs winning. Last week, I was holding my breath for a quarter and a half. I donโt get as stressed because the opposition I have a lot of love for.โ
Jai has played primarily on the wing but, after the late-season upheaval in the Swans team, spent much of the qualifying final in the centre square, which is Calebโs natural habitat. Even if Jai is not given the job of shadowing his brother, they will undoubtedly draw swords at some point.
As kids, the pair, separated by two years and seven days, were fierce competitors. Throw in youngest brother Liam, a talented footballer himself in the VFL and at local level, and there was little peace for mum and dad.
โCricket was the worst,โ Tania said. โYouโd think, โOh good, theyโre playing cricketโ, then within an over, someone had cracked it, someone wasnโt out. It was all very competitive.
โThere were lots of fights. Theyโd get physical. Youโd have to react quickly. Otherwise it would escalate pretty quickly. I just herded them to different places. It was full on, it was very busy.โ
For much of their childhoods, Caleb had the size advantage until he reached 15, when Jai had a growth spurt. Caleb is now listed at 180 centimetres, 13cm shorter than Jai. For competitive siblings, having a taller younger brother adds complexities at that age.
โAs you can imagine, everyone else had a comment on it,โ Tania said. โโOh your brother is getting taller than youโ.โ
Jai, both parents say, would not often stir up his brother, but when he did, he would make it count.
โJai would say stuff like, โWhatโs it like down there?โ,โ Jamie said.
In the main, Caleb had come to terms with his lot though he would occasionally wonder why he had missed out on that part of the genetic lottery.
โI honestly think Caleb was hoping there was more growth coming,โ Jamie said. โI must admit there would be the odd time when Jai passed him, thereโd be only me and Tania around, and heโd look at us and go, โWhat the hell happened? Whereโs my height?โ
โCaleb didnโt mind. I suppose heโd talk it off and come up with some other way he was better than Jai.โ
As footballers, their careers have taken different paths. Caleb was a top-10 draft pick who played just about immediately, has multiple All-Australian and best-and-fairest awards. Jai, a late selection, has fought tooth and nail for his 33 games, moving to a second club for greater opportunities.
They have played plenty of cricket together, but the only times they have been on the same footy field have been as opponents.
They could easily have been teammates. Hawthorn selected Jai with pick 53 in 2021. Fremantle had pick 54. Jamie got a call after the draft from Dockers coach Justin Longmuir, chief executive Simon Garlick and then footy boss Peter Bell apologising, telling him they would have taken him with the next selection.
โJai would say stuff like, โWhatโs it like down there?โโ
Jamie Serong on a rare sledge from Jai to his older, โlittleโ brother Caleb
The Dockers were rebuffed again last year when Jai, coming off back-to-back best and fairests with Hawthornโs VFL team Box Hill, chose to head north rather than west. Mum, Dad and older brother would have loved to see Jai don the purple with Caleb, but understood the decision.
โWe were proud,โ Jamie said. โHe didnโt get selfish but thought about where he fit the best and what gave him the best opportunity to succeed.
โYou did think to yourself if they were both in the one place, you know the brothers would like to play together. Once again, Caleb was great with that. He knew why Jai did it and was totally happy for him.โ
For the parents, it would have eased the logistical challenges that come with supporting three sons who play football in three states, sometimes at the same time.
They do not get to many games together, outside of the rare occasions the Dockers play in Melbourne. In a normal year, Tania would travel to Perth about five times, preferably during a point in the season when the Dockers play at home on consecutive weeks so she can spend more time with her son.
But this has not been a normal year for the family. In February, Jamie was diagnosed with Hodgkin lymphoma. Heโs happy to for his health battle to be made public as long as it does not overshadow his boysโ achievements.
He has finished chemotherapy with radiation therapy to come. The illness has made it challenging to fly interstate too often for games, Jamie said.
Travel will not be an issue for them in grand final week, barring injury or suspension to the winning brother.
โI know how hard theyโll go, I think it will drive both of them to go even further,โ Jamie said.
โItโs exciting to watch them, but Iโll be cringing at the same time, donโt get me wrong. Itโs really exciting to have two sons out there. Itโs a dream, to be honest.โ
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