Guitars, medication and heating pads: How these musicians manage chronic illness on the road

CBC Ottawa’s Creator Network is a place where young, diverse and unique storytellers can produce original video content to air on CBC and tell stories through their own lens.

Check out other Creator Network stories here or get in touch to pitch your own story.

Canadian indie musician fanclubwallet spent much of her first international tour in the back of her van, clutching a heating pad.

Fanclubwallet, whose name off stage is Hannah Judge, found an audience for her music through streaming during pandemic lockdowns.

When restrictions lifted in 2021, she went on her first tour with Canadian indie rock band Fleece. But during the trip, she experienced a flare-up of Crohn’s disease, the autoimmune condition she’d been diagnosed with as a teen.

“My first tour felt like the first day at a new job,” she said.

She encountered unexpected challenges, like being unable to help her bandmates load heavy equipment and instruments from the van to the venue because of the pain.

“I felt like I looked like a total diva.”

Though her bandmates were understanding as Judge, then in her early 20s, rested between shows, she said the experience opened her eyes to just how difficult being on the road with a chronic illness could be.

Still, she said she wanted to show other musicians that it was possible to tour despite a health condition. She explored how others in the industry handle it in a video made in collaboration with CBC Ottawa’s Creator Network.

WATCH | These musicians deal with chronic illness. Here’s how they manage it on tour:

Her music went viral during lockdown. When the world opened up, chronic illness made touring a challenge

When Hannah Judge, also known as fanclubwallet, watched her music go viral during pandemic lockdowns, she was able to balance her growing career and Crohn’s disease. Now that she’s touring, managing her health is a whole new dynamic. She spoke with other musicians about the ways they do it in a short documentary with CBC Ottawa’s Creator Network.

Crohn’s is a lifelong chronic autoimmune disease that inflames the gastrointestinal tract. Symptoms can include abdominal pain and cramping, severe diarrhea, rectal bleeding, blood in the stool, weight loss and a loss of appetite.

For Judge, symptoms come and go unpredictably, but the pain can become so intense that she sometimes fades in and out of consciousness.

“It kind of feels like glass or sandpaper going through your intestines,” she said. A regular sleep schedule and avoiding certain foods can help, she added.

In the early days of her music career, as her songs gained online traction during lockdowns, Judge could manage her symptoms by curling up in bed between Zoom meetings.

But once pandemic restrictions eased, she discovered touring came with its own set of challenges like finding food in new places that won’t trigger her symptoms, or figuring out how to keep her medication refrigerated at a consistent temperature.

If her medication were to spoil on tour, buying another dose abroad would cost thousands — or tens of thousands — of dollars. That’s a cost she can’t afford, she said, explaining that it would force her to end a tour and go home early to get another dose, disappointing fans and cancelling work for her bandmates.

“It’s a very intense stress,” she said.

Other musicians managing Crohn’s

American alternative hip-hop and indie rock musician Yoni Wolf of the band WHY? understands the challenges of planning a tour around chronic illness first-hand.

The longtime artist said he struggled with health issues for years before being diagnosed with Crohn’s more than a decade ago, and realized he needed to adapt the typical rock ‘n’ roll lifestyle to protect his well-being.

“You can’t just do what everyone else is doing. You can’t just eat what everyone else is eating,” he said in an interview recorded for Judge’s documentary.

Wolf said he cooks his own meals instead of eating out, books Airbnbs instead of crashing on a friend’s couch, and takes care not to schedule too many shows in a row. While it may seem simple, Wolf said these adaptations stretch an already tight tour budget even tighter, and make it even more challenging to plan.

But without touring, he said a career in music wouldn’t be possible as recording and songwriting alone doesn’t pay the bills.

“I’d have to get a different kind of job,” he said.

For Judge, managing her illness is a lot of work in addition to managing her career as a recording and touring musician, and the possibility of a flare-up forces her to think ahead more than other artists who don’t have chronic illness.

But even with Crohn’s and the risks of going on the road, Judge said it’s still worth it. 

“I’m just gonna keep making albums,” she said. “Keep touring, hopefully — touring for as long as I can.”

• Got an idea for your own Creator Network video? Learn more about how to pitch your own story here.